Monday, February 1, 2010

The Australian Broadcasting Network is saying that Alexandra Adornetto "set chastity belts all aflutter with her weekend opinion piece in the Age." Ms. Adornetto, who is seventeen, was responding to Australian Opposition politician Tony Abbot's comments- that he hoped his daughter's would not give away their virginity lightly. Here is an excerpt of her highly articulate thoughts, which were carried by more than one paper in Australia:

Listening to teenage boys ridiculing girls they perceive to be ''easy'' leaves me feeling perturbed. I imagine that the girls have invested emotionally while the boys seem able to detach emotion from sex. Some graphically relate their sexual exploits and invent nicknames (''slutty-mc-slut-slut'' and ''parachute vagina'' are two I've heard). And girls are just as prone to judging each other.

Let me assure you that the need for a good reputation is still alive and well in leafy, middle-class Melbourne. I was recently at a bar with two close male friends. One of them, a very pretty and upstanding school captain, was virtually assaulted by two scantily clad, intoxicated girls who wasted no time in propositioning him for sex. Rather than being excited by the prospect, he found their advances both off-putting and embarrassing. It is disappointing that many girls are willing to trade self-respect for the privilege of changing their Facebook status to ''in a relationship''.

In an age where sex is used to sell everything from breakfast cereal to furniture, it has become easy to confuse sex with a true connection that is mutual and based on trust, respect and acceptance. Preserving one's virginity for the right person may not be a popular view but there's a lot to be said for it. Given that threesomes and even group sex are not that uncommon among my peers, it wouldn't hurt to revisit some traditional values.

While it is vital for girls to feel empowered and independent, this does not mean behaving in ways that compromise dignity and self-respect. It is unfortunate that even in our enlightened society, double standards persist. A boy can have as much sex as he likes and this makes him ''experienced'' or ''skilled'', but a girl is never spoken of favourably.

Some people are too concerned about being politically correct to admit that girls still need to be aware of their reputation. Perhaps it's time for school sex-ed programs to be about more than how to put on a condom. Actions have repercussions and teenagers need to be aware of this.

Teenagers have a natural curiosity and are keen to clock up experiences. What they need to be wary of is that some experiences may erode their sense of self and lead to a fragmentation of morals.

Tony Abbott was doing his paternal duty in wanting his daughters to feel respected and secure rather than used and abused. I can only applaud and, in keeping with his advice, my search for Mr. Worthy continues.

No comments:

Post a Comment